This may sound like an oversimplification but if your government even has ‘Armageddon’ fears to play down over the primary reason it gives for its own existence, then you need to take a step back and think about what you’re doing and how badly you’re fucking it up.
Also a sidenote but if you can hear warnings that our nation will face shortages of food, fuel and medication because of Brexit but still think Brexit is totally working out and is totally worth it, you too need to take a big step back and reassess your priorities in life.
If you track this blog’s posts back a ways you’ll see me being really annoyed at the idea of making Vince Cable the leader of the Liberal Democrats.
Around that same time I was on here defending Tim Farron during the election and his ‘gay sex’ debacle.
I regret that deeply.
Because it seems nowadays every time Tim Farron opens his mouth he comes out with something that just makes me dislike him as a person more and more.
Vince Cable might be a coalition-laden old fudder who isn’t exactly what one would call an inspiring presence, but at least he’s not a homophobic Bible-thumper who spends seemingly most of his time trying to justify his homophobic ideals and play the victim because he got called out on them.
The ‘Tories think about offering Nando’s discount card to young people to join their party’ thing was good for a laugh, but it underlies a fucked up message that the Tories apparently think so little of the young that they believe they can almost irreparably fuck over an entire generation with their policies but that a promise of cheaper chicken would be enough for that generation to forgive them and pay to throw their lot in with the hideous bastards.
How the Liberal Democrats could have better handled themselves post-2015:
Keep Nick Clegg as leader – I’m not even kidding. As much as people may laugh at the guy’s misfortune he was their leader for a reason and was the best among them at least at being the prominent politician type. He was affable, charming, charismatic, personable, and looked every bit the part. I mean come on, could anyone, even true party die-hard loyalists, really picture Tim Farron as Prime Minister?
If unable to keep Clegg, pick Norman Lamb – I wasn’t exactly inspired by Norman Lamb in the leadership contest between him and Farron. But the Liberal Democrats were always going to have to deal with coalition baggage regardless. With Lamb they’d have had that, sure, but at least they would only have that. Rather than juggling both that and Tim Farron’s idiotic ‘gay sex’ nonsense that killed the party’s chances in 2017 before the starting pistol even fired on their campaign.
Immediately own up to the mistake of coalition – I’m more forgiving than most when it comes to the Liberal Democrats and their actions in coalition with the Tories, but this should have been a no-brainer. I get they wanted to frame their work as a positive and that argument could have worked logically, but logic and politics don’t mix too well sometimes. They should have come out immediately with a hard line under coalition, admitted they fucked up royal by agreeing to it, and went from that as their baseline when mentioning it. It just plays better in terms of political optics, which is what the party needs.
Go hard in on the Tories on everything – I remember reading their 2017 manifesto and in the introduction they basically pitch their whole campaign as “elect us as the Opposition” which is bonkers. They spent more time going after Labour than anyone else it feels like. Rule 1 of politics should be if you aren’t the Tories, spend every waking moment raking those born-to-rule pony-fuckers over every set of hot coals you can find. Don’t go after the fucking Opposition, especially not after you just got out of coalition with the Tories and want to be taken seriously again and not just labelled as Tory-enablers.
Chill it on the Brexit thing – This is the most controversial among Lib Dems, probably. Look, I voted Remain and still believe Brexit is a fucking car crash unfolding at Inception-level slow motion. But hitching your entire political identity to “we don’t like Brexit” is… well yeah it makes you stand out a bit but it limits you so much. I didn’t know anyone, even among my political active circle of friends, who knew what the fuck the Liberal Democrats either stood for or wanted to do outside of just “another referendum” during the 2017 general election.
… I don’t know what this post is or why I decided it needed to exist, I just had this on my mind today and wanted to ramble my half-baked ideas off somewhere.
2 years after the referendum and less than 1 year until what used to be the hard deadline for Brexit negotiations to be completed and our government finally deigns to tell their public what their Brexit vision actually is.
I feel like we should have gotten this a lot sooner. Say… at least before the general election the PM called where she campaigned on getting the electorate to trust her with Brexit.
It shouldn’t be possible to make me genuinely like the House of Lords because I hate the idea of them even as a concept and want it abolished, but apparently the Tories are just so shitty that unelected pricks in a Parliamentary Chamber that shouldn’t exist are a preferable alternative to our elected government.
That’s almost impressive in a really fucked up way.
Today I put a £5 bet on Theresa May being replaced as Prime Minister in 2019.
Would have done this year but I feel like the harridan’s going to hang on through to the new year, but sometime next year when the finalisation of her Brexit plan gets repeatedly fucked over by her own incompetence is when she’ll probably finally fuck off.
I don’t think any of her MPs, while publicly slagging her plan off, want the hassle of having to replace her while Brexit is still being negotiated. They’ll wait until afterwards, claim the deal she got was shit (which it will be for myriad reasons, not least of which is her aforementioned incompetence) then challenge her for the leadership.
I would have put a double on who her replacement is but the going favourite is Jacob Rees-Mogg and I don’t think I could live with myself if I made money off of that cretinous fuckbasket in any way.