Oh sorry, I mean “cabinet agrees Brexit deal.”
Oh sorry, I mean “cabinet agrees Brexit deal.”
To my mind, the Lib Dems are right about so much and yet it does them no good. They consistently opposed the Iraq war, for example, which is now an extremely mainstream view. Obviously the Labour party is very down on the Iraq war these days but, crucially, that wasn’t the case when it was actually happening. At that point, both Labour and the Tories were all for it.
The Lib Dems are also the only political group that’s consistently advocated proportional representation, and their failure to gain traction there may be the biggest disaster of the lot. It’s because of the first-past-the-post voting system that neither Labour nor the Conservative party can split without facing electoral annihilation. So Cameron called the Brexit referendum to keep the Tories together, and the majority of Labour MPs remain part of an organisation they believe to be ineptly or even malevolently led.
The energy required to keep the Conservative and Labour parties ostensibly united is tearing Britain and Europe apart. Meanwhile the hapless and laughable irrelevance of the only political movement properly addressing the country’s biggest problems is a fascinating manifestation of our looming national disaster.
You know I rail against Donald Trump a lot, and don’t get me wrong he is utterly and completely evil.
But the thing is on balance I prefer Donald Trump’s evil to our own country’s Tory evil.
Why? Because his evil is so blatant that it’s impossible for any sensible person to ignore it. It’s brazen, loud, arrogant, in-your-face, fuck-you evil obviously designed to make everyone else hate the prick while galvanising his increasingly narrow base of fanatical devotees who the rest of humanity would much rather pretend don’t exist out of shame of sharing a species with them.
That’s terrific evil because you know it’s there.
The Tories’ brand of evil is far worse because it’s precisely as disgustingly evil as Trump but it’s so benign and outright boring and grey that most people just seem to tune it out. They’re doing horrible things but because they do it in such a nondescript and mind-numbingly boring fashion it either makes most people jut tune it into the background white noise, or it dresses itself in such a generically ‘standard’ look that it makes otherwise sensible people just go along with it.
Like, Trump’s fans are morons but the divide is obvious. Anyone who supports him has a galloping case of the crazies and everyone who doesn’t knows that about them and pick it out immediately.
With a Tory voter you can be talking to them for hours and they’re a perfectly reasonable and friendly and personable person and it’s only later that you realise what fucking horrors they willingly vote for and it shatters your idea of them.
The hardest evil to fight is the evil that is so boring that most people don’t even realise it exists.
That’s the Tories.
Trump is obviously evil and the divide between those who know that and those who think it’s worth the destruction of America just to ‘trigger’ liberals is clear as day, the battle lines easily defined.
Now I’ve written this and tagged it with Trump-related hashtags it’s going to be fun seeing the Trump loyalists precisely prove my point by embarrassing themselves in the notes of this one.
Who the fuck even needs satire any more when you have real politicians being this dumb in public?
The ‘Tories think about offering Nando’s discount card to young people to join their party’ thing was good for a laugh, but it underlies a fucked up message that the Tories apparently think so little of the young that they believe they can almost irreparably fuck over an entire generation with their policies but that a promise of cheaper chicken would be enough for that generation to forgive them and pay to throw their lot in with the hideous bastards.
On the other hand…
If they’re stupid and self-destructive enough to do this, I win £35 which will be immediately donated to an opposition party of my choosing because honestly fuck the Tories.
Hey, remember who was Home Secretary in 2013?
Oh, that’s right. Theresa May.
So… when can we expect your resignation, Prime Minister?
I know the usual and obvious answer but let’s look at this logically. These are the councils the Liberal Democrats won:
These are not places where Labour is on the cusp of victory if only those pesky Liberal Democrats didn’t split their vote.
To assume that without the Lib Dems, Labour would be massive electoral forces on these councils is a huge leap from the more realistic answer that without the Liberal Democrats these councils would be pretty damn solid and impenetrable Tory majorities with an eclectic spate of independents and some minority presence from Labour or the Greens. Certainly not enough to challenge the majority.
I get that it’s annoying when your party isn’t always winning all the time, but surely we must all agree that any loss for the Tories is a gain for the nation as a whole at this point.
Unless you’re one of those people who genuinely think the Liberal Democrats are worse than the Tories, but if you think that frankly you’re beyond help and I don’t care to know you.
We got her, folks!
Goodbye you toxic harridan. I’d say it’s been nice knowing you but it damn well hasn’t. Oh and please do let every single door you can find hit you on the way out, repeatedly if possible.
I swear at this point our government’s only real plan for Brexit negotiations is just to throw out whatever idea they happen to be thinking of at the time and just pray that they can get away with it and that somehow nobody would ever notice how stupid it is.
Then when called on it, they immediately back down. They form a new huddle, and the outcome is that they propose some other nonsense idea that’s immediately laughed out of the room.
I think literally anyone could do a better job of it than our government is currently managing. Just pick like 5 people off the street at random. Don’t even tell them what they’re doing, just bundle them blindfolded into the back of a van and dump them out in Brussels. They’d still get on better than Theresa May’s embarrassing lunatics.